Today is my dog Annie's eleventh birthday, which reminds me of one of my personal pet peeves; kids who are forced to wear full body harnesses. No, I am not referring to rock climbing equipment rather a dog like leash that parents strap on their kid's wrist, or belt onto their chest. Living within twenty minutes of Disneyland (the happiest place on earth for all children besides those in full body harnesses), I have witnessed this cruelty to young children far too many times.
A story that best explains my views on the issue is one of my sister Amy's coworker who wants to name his kids Freedom and Justice. When Freedom and Justice ripen to the age of walking he will strap on the kids full body harness leashes. Every time Freedom and Justice would try running away, he would whip their leashes back and yell out loudly for all to hear "Freedom, Justice come back here!"
I propose that we put an end to this child cruelty and ban on all Full-Body Harness Leashes. Instead I suggest taking an old beer (or Odouls) can filled with pennies and every time the child wants to run away or misbehaves, you shake the can incessantly in their ear until they have settled down.
Written While Listening to "Repilia" by The Strokes
my first advent calendar!
3 years ago
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